Cartoon

I wanna be a cartoon
Then kids would watch me each afternoon
I'd live inside your TV
The girls are sexy by only 2D


My head would split in two
Next frame I'm good as new and then
I'd swallow dynamite
You know I'd be alright again


I'd draw the things that I need
Anvils by Acme are all guaranteed
Got no opposable thumb
I'd solve the caper although I am dumb


I'll never age
I'll never die
My life is sponsored by Eskimo Pie
All that is bad
Is only pretend
Everything always works out in the end


I'd be a sugar-filled snack
I'd be on some kids backpack
I'd be a lunchbox for you
I'd be a convict's tattoo


All the animals talk
And they stand on two feet
And the Flintstones and Jetsons
Live just down the street
They'd syndicate me in places
Where I'll never live
And you would have
Gotten away with it, too
If it weren't for us meddling kids
I wanna be a cartoon