The Inaccurate Conception

i swear to god, mary, if you're steppin' out
there'll be some shit you don't even wanna think about
some shit i ain't gonna even say out loud
that'll just ruin the surprise and you'll soon find out
so why did you, mary, make up some some excuse
rattle off some shit about passive abusive
if you wanna get it, mary, then i'll show it to you
cause with a kid on the way, i'll be drinkin' for two

hold that thought, joey!
don't do nothin' crazy
you're not makin' any sense!
just sit down and take a deep breath
who put this idea in your head?

no, joey!
you know i wouldn't lie to you!
and i swear on the sun every word i've been sayin' is nothin' but the truth
no, joey!
you know i wouldn't do that to you!
never since that first day we met, i never looked at no one else.

i promise you, joey, if you listen to me, i can explain most everything
i know i been distant recently, but you been so busy and a girl's got needs
i aint crazy, joey, i ain't askin' for much, all i'm askin' you now if to stick with us
think about it, joey, you can't leave me now
our son's gonna need his daddy around

save your breath, mary, you misunderstand me
i'll be there for the kid
just tell me who your boyfriend is
i need to have a word with him

no, mary, you better call your daddy now
and even though he'd never lay a finger on you, he'd better get his shotgun now
oh boy sweet mary, such a bottle of innocence
but every pretty face hides an ugly heart, and mary, you're no different

thank you, mary, for tellin' me the truth
and i wish this didn't have to happen to you
i said i'd forgive ya if you just came clean
i guess that's what you get for honesty.