Confusion

I am lying on the floor surrounded by deep silence.
What kind of show is this, what's happened?
The fire is still burning and melting,
In my head confused thoughts are exploding.
I am lying on the floor surrounded by silence,
Shouldn't I know better, that I need a distance?
Promise myself that I never want you back again.
I beg you, do not torture my feelings.
Take this terrible pain off me, I need to spit it out,
Too long you've sucked (?), once more I make a retreat.
I am lying on the floor surrounded by silence,
Shouldn't I know better, that I need a distance?