Disease

if I could try to make things better,
I would try to make them better with you
maybe we could fix this
if you understood what I had been through
it seems it always comes down to this:
you fall apart, then you feel remiss
maybe you'll say I hurt you,
but I hurt me, too, and you don't care
and I just can't put you through this.
you don't deserve it, it isn't fair.
oh, yeah, I know that I'm a disesase,
and I just can't infect you with me

and so I'll lie on my bedroom floor
and trace your name in the carpet thread
maybe you shouldn't talk to me anymore
I figured it out when you said that -

maybe I'll walk out on this
I'll turn my back on this or I'll turn away
if you've got someone new on your mind,
it's not me this time. I had my day.
and maybe I'll turn down all the lights
and try to forget your face tonight.

and so I'll tell you it's all my fault
and I will displace the blame instead
maybe you shouldn't talk to me anymore
I figured it out when you said that -

you would love nothing more than to prove me right
and since we spent that time on the phone,
I've stopped sleeping at night
and you'll say I have the greenest eyes you've ever seen
and that if you had one hundred years
you'd never ever understand me