Emptying Out Ashtrays

if these cigarette's are all that keep me goin'
what am i gonna when once i quit
will the world all of a sudden just stop spinnin'
would i be too scared just to look up and notice it
if my memory of you is all i'm keeping
why's it seem like maybe that's too much
when forgeting you were dying
all the options i have left
my body starts to tell me i've not lived long enough
maybe it's time to empty out the ashtrays
and not remember your phone number
and i'll forget which days your birthday
i would like to go to sleep and not have dreams of standing next to you
i don't know what i'll do
sometimes lying to yourself is so much better than the truth