A Toast

you tell me that you wanna go to heaven

but you run around acting

like you're gonna live forever

when you tell me that you're going through hell

but you're puttin' others through it

and you say that i smell

like i haven't had a shower in 23 days

like an unbalanced beer

can two minutes too late

a look like a stale face

from a fresh grave

with a chip on my shoulder

and an eye full of rage



can you taste that beer

with your back to the bar

can you smell a cigarette

without letting down your guard



ten cans, 4 a.m. friends

the sad thing is

that you've always been like this

moaning in a bed shaped like a hearse

believe the lies that you tell yourself



you tell me that my problem is thinking

i can chase it away

with a problem like drinking

you tell me you don't wanna get old

but you've got a party on the line

and a grave on hold

like a drunk operator

like a game of roulette

like a martini balanced

on a whiffle ball bat

when a hard wind blows

it's gonna fall down

when the wind blows

there'll be broken glass all around



can you taste that beer

with your back to the bar

can you smell a cigarette

without letting down your guard



ten cans, 4 a.m. friends

the sad thing is

that you've always been like this

moaning in a bed shaped like a hearse

believe the lies that you tell yourself

things could never get worse



can you taste that beer

with your back to the bar

can you smell a cigarette

with a smell so far away



ten cans, 4 a.m. friends

the sad thing is

that you've always been like this

like a bright shiny apple with a worm inside

believe the lies that you tell yourself

this is the only way to die