Haunting

Beneath the weight
on my shoulders
I carry around every day
The lies I've told
have been repeated
& shuffled into my deck

The way you always
listen to me
& stumble around in my head
& happen to find what you're after
before I realize you're there

I could never find you when I'd look into myself
or hear when you'd been haunting me for weeks
Here beside the pillow I've been smothering
a letter to the man who would not let you in

I knew nothing really mattered
I knew everyone is in it for themselves
I found comfort in the absence
But I grew tired of waiting around

You knew I would one day leave here
You'd bend up startled
& I would be a ghost
above your bed
a glowing memory
of the girl who grew tired
of always sneaking in