Holding Back

I felt like I was so far away and the moments ran so slow
Now every second comes flying by and I can't seem to keep control
Holding back the feelings I've tried so hard to feel
Will I ever know what's real until you show me what I can't see

Out of my hands, onto you
If I let go of what I have to cling to you
I want to have trust in you but I can't, and I won't

If no one knows me better than myself
Then why am I not the one?