Me Vs. Toilet Paper / Gandhi Vs. Heston

I just went to bathroom
and when I wanted to wipe my ass
I realized that toilet paper
was stuck in my ass

if I want to take it out
with my hands it will smell like shit
but if I try with something else
I might injure my ass

so please what should I do?
has anyone experience
with this situation too?

P.S.: the girl with paper in her ass

Heston's an asshole
pumping up the shotgun
Heston's an asshole
American dream
I never had this thing for supreme

Charlton's a butthole
blah blah la-la-la-la
I never had this thing for supreme

get out of my face!
back to the planet of apes
I never had this thing for supreme

say goodbye so long
and stay where you belong
cause I never had this thing for supreme
I never had this thing for supreme

I never had this thing for supreme
I never had this thing for supreme