The Stupid Things We Did

I don't know why I do this every year
I should have learned by now that there is no one in this
world that I should be with
But I want someone
To kiss me
And hold me
And let me taste their skin
And tell me funny stories about the
Stupid things they did

But
I'm not smart enough
And I'm not handsome enough
And I'm not into resting
Enough
To keep anyone
Next to me

In the mornings I
Wake up first
To pretend that life
Won't
Get in the way
But I
Know that you are beautiful
And there is no reason
Why you should stay

Because I am so fucking stupid
And I am someone who is afraid
To be left
By myself

And I do expect you
And I don't blame you
And I do expect you
To be leaving me
On my own

Love doesn't exist in me
I don't trust
Anything but puppets
And my secret place

This is why I always speak so vaguely
And none of my songs ever make
Any sense

I'm not smart enough
And I'm not handsome enough
And I'm not interesting enough
To keep anyone next to me