Pray You Die In Surgery

They say if you ain't cheating you ain't trying
The answer that I give you every time
You rather me lie
If that's what it takes for a fake smile I'll rather cry
Put my pride to the side
It got me worn out and tired
I'll tell the truth and let you decide if you staying down
It's some sinners that come with mine
Love me hard 'til we die
And even after this chapter gone you'll still be mine in the sky
If I go before you tho I hope you use me as a guide
Tribulations and trials, turn a half to a nine
In these streets I'm a giant
Why my peoples had to be slimes
Why my momma had to die

Ain't get a chance to look her youngest grandson in his eye
Why Red leave me behind, when you the only reason I tried
Why Quan let niggas wreck his new rides soon as he buy em'
Lil Dead took a shot to his head trying to get high
Lift his seat back too far, it was only one bullet fall
All it took to make us cry, all us shooting even while driving
Ain't no way they gone survive when four cars deep sliding
Take whoever who outside, no innocence in my eyes

If I'm wrong God don't be too hard with yo judgement
Here again in this position how can you judge us
For waking up with grudges killing for our loved ones
East side Taliban, Riata Drive to Tubman
Nobody never loved us, hugged us, or gave us nothing
Deuce deuce rusty get up close that's something
It don't mess with my conscious fuck em' he had it coming
Something out of nothing, hunnid you dice this onion
The king of the jungle, Island ain't nothing above it
Made man, all muscle don't go against each other
Wish you took it serious when I told you I love you
Must of thought I was funny, like my issues ain't mean nothing

Instead I open ya thumper in memory of yo brother
You rather call and ask what the budget like it ain't personal
Like I ain't see you cry at his funeral or it wasn't hurting you
Like when that day you took pills to swallow that we wasn't praying for you
With RIP on our shirt, whoever outside after curfew
You tell my momma I'ma be late to heaven because of what I done turned to
Hurdle after hurdle, murder after murder

I be tryna guard my sister from a far, nobody hurt her
Kept calling her phone said that I needed her it was urgent
She let her boyfriend run off with a quarter pound of purple
I was just like 20 tryna stack up my first 30
But I forgive you ion blame you
You know I'm kind, game for certain
You know that we the worst since back doors and closed curtains
And I wish I knew back then what them decisions would determine
Ion think I would change nothing except some deaths that was occurring
And my heart been hurting and them percy's wasn't working

My son won't do nothing I did let alone worser
Won't be a work, a burden, nor murder
Without encouragement I still came out the thorough-list
Jammed in my hand the last time I met in person
Red in my head said, saying every man have a purpose
Soon as you done searching I'ma be in the dark lurking
Sea island surfing toting yeeky's in churches
Soon as we load these 30s yall gone load niggas in hearses
And dog don't get refurbished if you change the shape to hershy's
But fuck it if it's working, no returns on none of these purchases
Drenched when he was thirsty may the lord have mercy
A water boy permanently and even after they bury me

Was I wrong to pray that niggas died in they surgery
Was I wrong to cut em off before I let em murder me
Am I wrong for letting it still worry me currently
Am I wrong for tryna get them off before they burn me