I Don't Do Shit

Today's the day you get hit with some reality
You need to learn how real people live
This is the story.

I got fourteen chairs to lean back in
Three recliners for straight relaxin'
and two different beds to go to sleep
No Mattress Factory, kid, I ain't cheap
I got the California King with the Pillowtop
10 PM, you see the pillows drop
Why're you in my bedroom, are you Dick Cheney?
Get out.

I don't do shit.

I don't do shit, that's my decision
Not doin' shit is like my religion
Look to the east five times a day
and if I'm doin' shit, then I put it away

Oh I should come to the club and get crazy?
I'm the Saddam of being lazy
And besides, I can drink beer at home
I do it every afternoon.

I don't do shit.

I wanna give a shout-out to sitting down
Give a shout-out to laying down
Wanna give a shout-out to typing stuff into Google
Wanna give a shout-out to Cesar Millan
for letting me imagine what it would be like if I trained my dog
I wanna give a shout-out to waking up late
Don't hate
The TV is on and it's a motherfucking marathon
My day is over man
I'm going to be right here because I don't do shit
I don't do shit

The TV is on and it's a motherfucking marathon