Opening

ENSEMBLE
Bobby... Bobby... Bobby... Bobby

JOANNE
Hi, this is a dirty phone call. Larry and I will be in the country so we'll miss any birthday celebration. Anyway, you're thirty-five. Who wants to celebrate being that old? Well, I only hope I look as good as you when I'm your age.

PETER
Hi, Bob, it's Peter. Get those girls out of your bed and pick up the phone, will ya? God, I'm so envious I can't even talk. Call me.

AMY
Hi, Bobby. It's Amy. I just called to say that if I'm late for the surprise birthday party tonight please tell Paul I'm running... oh wait, you're not supposed to know that there's... Judy? Judy?! Oh goodness, I'm afraid I've dialed the wrong number! Sorry, just ignore this phone call... oh, God...

BOBBY
Hi, this is Bob. Yes, today is my birthday. And yes, you may leave a message about how happy you are that I'm turning thirty-five. And whatever you're calling about... the answer is yes.

My birthday. It's my birthday. Do you know you had me scared to death? I was just about to run out of this place like nobody's business, I was. I mean, I didn't know. I mean, what kind of friends would surprise you on your thirty-fifth birthday? Mine. Then again, how many times do you get to be thirty-five? Eleven?

Okay, c'mon, say it, get it over with, it's embarrassing, quick, I can't stand it.

ENSEMBLE
Happy Birthday, Robert!

BOBBY
I stood it. Thank you for including me in your thoughts, your lives, your families. Yes, thank you for remembering. Thank you.