Rejoice

and I have not yet arrived.

I may deceive myself,but I still taste blood
when I swallow,but you say,
"My love, my child, dry your eyes.
Don't you know that what I start I will see through,
see right through you,
and that scares you."
You see right through me.
"That shouldn't scare you."

My face to the ground as I shuffle my unlaced shoe,
and push my hands into my pockets so hard against the lining
that they threaten to break through.
Heavy breathing marks the minutes keeping perfect 4/4 time.
I follow cracks in the pavement back to my apartment,
such straight lines...what time is it?

How many ways is there to count the moon?

and I have not yet arrived.

I've been trying so hard to tell you that I'm dying,
but I've been having a hard time explaining without lying.

I had barely left the yard, but I doubled back on broken track.
Either I was weak or you were too hard a master.
"Faster, faster!" I cried, spitting selfishness and lies.
Ten shovelfuls of dirt, and I sat and waited your return.

When my legs are broken, when my wings are pinned,
and blood stains the bedsheets where I tried to cut them free.
I bleed, and I bleed, and I bleed.

If it's the kindness of God that moves men to repentance,
then I've got some penance that's long overdue.
You've been nothing but faithful while I've been unable
to consistently follow through.

I choose;
but do I choose?
and yet you
refuse to lose me.

Rejoice.

With heads down and hands high,
with one voice, with one cry
creation joins you, unite;
sing down the stars light.

Rejoice, oh my soul,
and all that is within me sings.