If You Want To Wear A Hat

If you want to wear a hat

You'd better get one that looks better than that

Or on second thought the hat upon your head

Would look good with a feather instead



Then you need to ask a bird

Which is more complicated than you have heard

For the birdie will not cooperate

Unless you guarantee the going rate



So you need to get a job

For that you must stop dressing like a slob

As the suit that you are wearing my friend

Makes me think that you are trying to offend



When a suit is what you need to wear

Get one that makes you look like a square

And if you want some visual relief

Change the color of your hankerchief



If you want to wear a hat

But didn't know it was as difficult as that

Keep in mind what your brother-man said

Let the sunshine shine upon your head



If you want to wear a hat,

You didn't know it was as difficult as that...