The Big Bad Retail Wasteland

On a summer's day in the month of May
Came a twentysomethingish slob.
He was strapped for cash as a recent crash
Had cost him his dot-com job
He was heading for a land wear you sweep the floor
Seventeen times an hour or more
Were you work all day for little pay
In the big bad retail wasteland

In the Big Bad Retail Wasteland
You'll never need your brain
Just smile and nod and apologize
Until you go insane
And though they may make promises
You'll never get a raise
Oh the hours are lame and the jobs mundane
And you have to wear a tag that displays your name
In the big bad retail wasteland

The customers are the biggest dopes
Who've ever been let loose
Unless you count the manager
Who's dumber than a moose
The days are all routinized
And always just the same
They'll be overjoyed when your skills are void
They'll replace you ass with a shiney new droid
In the big bad retail wasteland

In the big bad retail wasteland
The little guy never wins
He'll go right out of business
When the new Wal Mart goes in
And the union organizers
Are simply shot on sight
You get home and then pray like all good men
That the slime that ate cleveland will get hungry again
For the big bad retail wasteland

After just a day you'll be glad to say
You wanna hang the jerk that invented work
And drown the slobs with the cushy job
And smother the schmuck who has all the luck
And murder the guys in the power ties
And blow up the town where it all goes down
Your college degree will be worth less than zero
In the big bad retail wasteland